we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
i drank out of a bidet.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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