Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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