we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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