hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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