ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
