He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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