We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
