seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
