sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
vagina is talking i cant
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
