btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize