You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
