She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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