nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
