couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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