So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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