we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
