dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
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