Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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