I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
