Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i think i have herpe
just one?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
