best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize