I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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