You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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