Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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