When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
