I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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