And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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