Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
