The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize
