Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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