how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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