We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Too much gin, very little bucket
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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