home. puking in laundry basket.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
