You made me cry and you don't even care
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I deserve this hangover.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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