morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
