Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
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