just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
