the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We named our party play list daddy issues
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
