i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
