She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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