she was so not down for the gang bang
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
