i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
