i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Dick very happy bro
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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