i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
