look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
