i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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