No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
