when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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