I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize