I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
