im gay
i know
yea but for you.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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