I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
